April Fools

Sunday was April Fools Day. It was a day filled with practical jokes that you either got sucked into or you just got aggravated because whoever is pulling the prank wasn’t funny. Some people are April Fools all year-long. They just can’t help themselves. They are the gift that just keeps on giving. For example, take Rick Santorum. Take a listen to this guy on the subject of history not being taught at 8 University of California colleges.

Well Mr. Santorum, if you had someone on your staff actually do a Fact Check, you would know that only one UC system school doesn’t offer history and that is UC San Francisco. The only reason why they don’t offer history? It’s because it’s a medical school. I don’t know about you, but if I’m having a coronary, I need my doctor to know how to fix my heart and save my life. Not recite the Gettysburg Address at the top of his lungs in the ER.

Another example of April Fools are these people

Now, I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed, but if I see a large rotating cloud heading for my car, my job, or my living room, it’s safe to say that this rotating cloud is not coming to watch Sportscenter with me in my living room. Filming the cloud heading straight for your house like it’s your grandma’s 100th birthday probably isn’t one of the smartest things you could do and I don’t think anyone would be offended if you stop doing amateur film making and ran to save yourself for what could be potentially a deadly occurrence. Storm chasing isn’t the smartest way to get noticed. Being alive is notice enough.

The next set of April Fools are these

People who post their dead loved ones picture lying in their coffin,  their wake, and/or funeral on videotape on Youtube, Facebook , or Twitter. Your loved one’s last memory on this Earth shouldn’t be an impromptu photo shoot that you knew about but didn’t inform them of. Stalking the dead in their permanent rack like you’re the paparazzi is not fresh.

The next set of April Fools are

Lottery winners who allow themselves to get sued. Greed in this instance gets you broke. The people who are going to really get your fortune are the attorneys. They are going to milk this cow for all it’s worth. If you would get out of your own way, this problem would be easy to solve. If you take home after taxes 105 million, you could easy break off the other people in your pool a cool 3 million. That comes to 45 million. After all of that, you still end up with a cool 60 million to live on. I”m sure that beats the 10.50 per hour you were making before you hit the lottery. Share the wealth with the people who could have potentially been in the same spot you’re in now and not attorneys

The last set of April fools are

The Zimmerman family. While I understand you defending your family member to the end, do yourself a favor and just stop. We all have seen the police footage. If he has a broken nose, cuts to the head, and was beaten to a pulp to the point that he had to shoot someone, them I’m an Albino married to Jennifer Lopez for 10 years. Those two don’t exist and neither does your brother and son version exist except in his own mind.

There is a saying that you can’t tell a fool nothing. I beg to differ. I can tell a fool to get out of their own way and stop making life difficult for themselves. It’s kinda easy. Just stop and think.


One thought on “April Fools

  1. I served in the US Army for years, and one thing you learn about use of force is giving what you are receiving (Escalation of Force 101). That being said, a gun is not an appropriate weapon in a fist fight. PERIOD. Police would call the first escalation verbal non-compliance, which escalates to non-lethal weapons, which in turn leads to show of force, and so on….

    – Me

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