commentary

You’re Not Evil Lyn

It is so easy to be a Monday morning arm-chair quarterback. You can always see and say things that you wouldn’t have done after the fact. I, as a blogger, have come to that point in regards to one person. Last month I wrote a piece called The Reality of Abuse (August 2012) In it I accused

Basketball Wives star Evelyn Lozado of using her incident with now ex husband

Chad Johnson to bolster up interest in her now shelved reality show with Johnson. I even went so far and called her out of her name and started calling Evelyn by the new name Evil Lyn. When you’re a writer and writing about others lives, you must have the where with all to admit that maybe you were wrong. Well, in this case as a writer and blogger, I can admit I was dead wrong for calling her Evil Lyn. Here is why I was wrong.

Last Saturday, I watched the Iyanla Vanzant show Fix My Life season premiere with Evelyn asking for help from Vanzant. Now, I already was on the defensive from all the antics that I had seen from Evelyn on Basketball Wives. But than Ms. Vanzant got to the heart of the matter with this

So I started to move a little in my thoughts of her. Then came this part with Evelyn’s mother Sylvia

Then a 60 degree turn came from me when this happened

So I said to myself ‘OK, it’s just one night, let see what happens in Part 2.’ Part 2 didn’t disappoint. The interview was after Evelyn filed for divorce from Chad and there were things like this

And at that moment, the other 300 degrees I had been holding came to pass. She was doing all this for what people like me and others who don’t really know her were going to think of her. Then this explaining her man pattern

That’s when it happened. I truly understood Evelyn Lozado, not the Evil Lyn Lozado I created in my mind. This was a 36-year-old woman in body, but a 13-year-old woman emotionally. And it was because of a man who decided not to be apart of her life for whatever reason. This is a sad pattern that goes on in our society. Men leaving little girls from the black, brown, yellow communities to figure out how to deal with themselves when it comes to men. These men don’t get that for the healthy developement for love when it comes to a man, they are the first men that their daughters fall in love with. Their the model. They set the bar. And when they are not there, you get what Evelyn is. And so that I say to Ms. Evelyn Lozado as a man, I’m sorry for the hurt you experienced from the men in your past. I’m also sorry for calling you Evil Lyn because you’re not an evil person. Now it’s your time to figure out who you is the woman not on Basketball Wives, but the woman you were put on this Earth to be. I’ll be watching. Not to bash, but to cheer you on every step of your new journey.

 

ss4d

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